There's no "we" in "I don't give a f....."

I'd put the whole title up- just worried that putting 'fuck' in the title might be some sort of red flag on either of the sites I post this on- Not trying to be a hypocrite- like those cited on a friend's Facebook page- where she wondered why people write 'f@ck', 'fu@k', 'fuc&', 'sh!t' and other dumb internet euphemisms for curse words on sites that wouldn't be accessed by the easily impressionable or offended

Anyhow- the original line I uttered Monday night (29 June) was "There's no 'we' in 'I don't give a fuck"- a play on the old And1 basketball shoe advertisement that had a guy saying "There's no 'I' in team- but there is one in 'I just kicked your ass" or something to that effect

Was watching Headline News' mosaic of 6 talking heads prattling over each other about the death of Michael Jackson (a.k.a. the "King of Pop") 4 nights after his passing- one of the supposed "experts" said "We wouldn't find ourselves in this mess had Michael left a will"- speculating Jackson had no will (supposedly incorrect) and it affected anyone beyond his family, ex-wives or supposed offspring

I have to agree with the analysis of Will Leitch of "Deadspin" blog fame- that people tend to use "us" and "we" in news analysis way too much- and it meant one thing pre- 11 September 2001 and means something different after- that the "us" and "we" that were arguing over the OJ case or Clinton impeachment were at the center of the news before and the "us" and "we"-treated stories the past several years are sidelights of sorts- like MJ's death or Jon and Kate

I was among those surprised by the treatment of Jackson's death- I would have thought the mass culture was past the idea of a Rudolph Valentino-style treatment Jacko's death- in fact- I theorized on the sports messageboard I'm on- had Jackson died before the first child-molestation case been settled in 1993- he'd have died on top of his game- Multi-platinum, legendary recording artist who'd starred at halftime of the Super Bowl that year- instead of the faded freak show that sold fewer and fewer records over the years and died before attempting some sort of "Siegfried and Roy"-level "comeback" in London next month

I was actually more surprised and touched by the death of Billy Mays Sunday- also at the age of 50- than I was by Jackson's passing- Historically, I was more surprised at word that Magic Johnson was quitting the NBA after contracting HIV in 1991- than I was by Jackson's cash-out- but I was most shocked at the general reaction of everyone I encountered personally or via the various forms of media

-Once again saw the ad for the Red Sox vs. Yankees version of "Connect Four" during the NESN Red Sox telecast this evening- perhaps the dumbest game idea this side of the Brett Favre version of "Operation" or Yao Ming's "Jenga"- but shows how dopey the whole Red Sox/ Yankees or mere Red Sox shit has gotten around these parts

- Saw an ad for the DVD release of the theatrical film "12 Rounds"- starring wrestling superstar John Cena- which seemed like it was just in the theaters 15 minutes ago (actually came out 27 March) - the DVD promises "Two alternate endings"- My question- do they count the actual ending of the film- for those who left well before it was over- as an "alternate ending"?

-Gross mass-produced pizza-chain food product of this blog- Pizza Hut's new Pizza Rolls- have had pizza rolls in various forms- at their best- they are sort of like the strombolis or pizza rolls you can get at various Italian/ pizza places in New Jersey or the general New York City area- at their worst- are the diarrhea-inducing frozen treats by Jeno's and others- but the Pizza Hut ones look like Crescent rolls with cheese and other fillings-make both Crescent rolls and fillings seem individually unappealing the more you think about them

Much sooner than what?

I wrote in my last entry here (3 June)- I'd be back much sooner than later- Well....
I thought of stuff- but aside from working oddly variant hours again the past couple weeks- stretches of night shifts followed by early-morning stuff followed inversely the last few days by nights again- has really fucked up what little- if any- rythym I have in everyday life

Anyhow- when I left this a couple weeks back- I promised what would be my version of a celebrity/ politician/ exemplary citizen- type graduation/ commencement speech- had I turned myself into any of the aforementioned/ anything accomplished period

I thought of this as I drove past one of the larger/ more prominent private high schools in Cambridge- as I was driving to the liquor store on a weekday afternoon a few weeks ago- as their commencement ceremony was letting out- kids in gowns and mortar boards coming out with their families- beaming at the young one's accomplishment- All I could think was "It doesn't really get any better than this, kid"- Sure, college could be 4 or 6 years of good times and maybe that's the speech where the message of "It's all downhill from here, suckers" speech would perhaps be most apt

The whole scene got me thinking- not just about the fact I missed my own private school graduation ceremony 22 years ago last Saturday (13 June 1987)- which I helpfully reminded my mother of on the date itself- but that no one ever tells you when you're young that grown-up life really sucks when you get out of school and older- either way- you could cash your youth in early and become a full-on adult by getting married and/ or having kids - or you just run out of youth while living by the same ideals/ mores- The net result pretty much still sucks either way

If I were ever accorded an audience for such a speech- I think I'd want to come out to Sammy Davis Jr.'s "Keep Your Eye on the Sparrow (Barretta's Theme)" as my entrance- and if I couldn't - I'd feel the need to recite the lyrics of it to the kids- who were all born when Robert Blake was better known as the white O.J. than the man associated with playing the cop with a parakeet- "When the going gets narrow" being the particular point if I had to recite the lyrics back to the young people- and maybe a few extemparaneous remarks about the day but shit (maybe a Clay DAvis "Sheeeeet" from "The Wire"), the general message from me would be the same as TV's Al Bundy- "Life sucks and it never gets any better"

-Speaking of which- someone has told me I should embrace my leaning to my beat traits- I've also been told my leaning toward negative thinking is one of my strongest traits- I really think I can think the worst about anything (blush)

-How dumb can the local news stories here in Boston get? Touched on this many times now- but two particular examples hit me recently-

-The Little Leaguer somewhere around here who struck out all 18 batters a couple weeks back- Were "The Simpsons" that prescient when they ran the episode with Homer bowling a 300 game and becoming a "Springfield Square" and friends with Ron Howard? The TV people expected the Little Leaguer to be circumspect or at least glib about his greatest achievement to that point? See all my stupid shit above about life going downhill after high school or college

-Or the story in Boston about the Phish fan that spread "Yankee" fertilizer on the lawn at Fenway Park during the jam band's much-awaited reunion show/ latently-unwanted reprise a few weeks back (30 May)- was covered like it was some type of political asassanation by local TV types- like the stupid story of the "Ortiz 34" jersey buried at the new Yankee Stadium last year- What happened to the idea of Boston being the home of "America's Best" local TV?- oh that was back in the early 1980's- ouch

Trashed, uninspired or merely crushed?

Once again- I have to explain an unplanned, long interregnum to the few that read these bleatings- on either of these sites- Have still been busy with work and other pursuits- though I've recently been spending a bit less QT on the other social site recently- in spite of my recent-months declarations that it could have been the Greatest Website Ever- long story- but it still stands as another site at this point- recent activity not withstanding

I'm sure Twitter or some other currently-nascent great idea will eventually (or sooner) wipe out Facebook and these host sites- internet telepathy being the only thing that could seem like the ultimate goal of all these sites- and I cannot make the proclamation that I hope not to live long enough to see that since it could be reality by 2012 or so

Anyhow- here's the random thought clearinghouse for now- while I wait for internet telepathy

-Speaking of Facebook shit- the "Living Social" application has to go down as more annoying than junk mail and cable infomercials on the personal annoyance list- I get shit from people whom I don't suspect are "Grey's Anatomy" viewers (I hope) are sending "Which 'Grey's Anatomy' Villian Are You" answers- If you claim not to give a fuck about the show- why should I give a fuck about your answer?

-Joint boyfriend/ girlfriend or husband/ wife or whomever/ altogether accounts on the Facebook site are as dumb as they were on MySpace or whatever- Cannot believe anyone would sublimate themselves to that shit

-Spent Memorial Day weekend with parade outside window in Somerville again- Obviously not live-blogged like I tried last year- if I'm writing this on 3 June- Anyhow- could have cared less about the 24 May proceedings- even if they'd proceeded down Highland Avenue with Communist-era-Stalin-esque heads in my image- Did not care- not to disrespect the war dead- but I feel once you've seen one flag-draped fire truck- you've seen them all

Speaking of Memorial Day and parades- I knew it was summer- when I was stuck in traffic the Saturday of that weekend and saw a fat woman in a knockoff-style #12 Tom Brady Patriots jersey put away a nip bottle of sauce and toss it in a nearby dumpster while I was stopped at a red light- then, while traffic was so slow- saw same woman pull out and put away another while I was stopped again- less than a half-mile away- behind annoying weekend traffic- Funniest thing I've seen on the street in a long time

-Before she testified this week- I had little sympathy for Sandra Boss- the mother of the child "Clark Rockefeller"/ Christian Gerhardtschneider/ whatever his real name was- produced while married to her/ abducted last summer- It took her 15 years to question his phony lineage or bon temps and years after they had a child together? She came across as a stereotypical Yuppie with child during her testimony- too involved in herself or career to know/ care- one of them will eventually be co-starring in Rod Blagojevich's episode in the Flava Flav/ Brett Michaels' edition of VH1's "Daisy Rock Flava Group Sex of Love" or perhaps an eventual remake of "Bang Bus 12"

-Worked such fucked-up hours last week- I went out to my wheels after 5am- on Back Bay street and realized I'd lucked into one of 5 spots or so on that street that weren't affected by shooting of either the new Adam Sandler buddy comedy or new Mel Gibson/ Tommy Lee Jones (I think) movie filming around here

-I'll be back much sooner than later- working on what would likely be my graduation speech/ valedictory to the young people- if, under any set of even plausibly theoretical circumstances, I were ever asked to do so

Passive blogging

I have not actively blogged in about three weeks or so- though I'm not sure there's a method of passive blogging (I revised the title of this after writing the preceding passage)- Between a stretch of non-work-inspired boredom, a trip to New Jersey, a return to working all the time and other internet pursuits- I haven't been on either Blogger or MySpace much recently

It's not that I haven't had anything happen to me or any ideas- Just haven't had either the time, concentration or gumption to put up anything recently- to wit: my recent jotted-down ideas-

-Whatever guitar/loud music detente I seemed to reach with my upstairs neighbor a month ago seems to have receded in recent days- first noticed his loud music last Friday which backslid into full-guitar blasting before I went to work this past Sunday (10 May) while the aforementioned blasted his joint's AC on what was at most a 65-degree day- I know it gets warm in upstairs units- but when its breezy and in the low 60's- an open window usually does the trick- though I shouldn't give a fuck about someone else's electric bill

-Speaking of music- was driving around one Sunday night after work- during a two-weeks straight stretch- and caught part of the Providence, RI rock station's (94.1 WHJY) local music station- I've had many laughs at the expense of both that that and the New Hampshire local show ("Rock 101") versus even the worst of the 3 Boston ones I can think of- the Providence one always seems to feature unusually bad heavy metal bands that seem to start from the point of being awful Misfits cover bands- and work backwards from there- cannot describe in writing better than that and still does not do full justice to actually hearing how bad they are

-Speaking of driving- finally had court date from 1 December 2008 ticket 2 weeks ago (30 April 2009)- Had to go to Framingham court house- located off Guadalcanal Ave- a block between- no shit- Anzio Street and Pearl Harbor Avenue- and also a street removed from what seems to be Framingham's public housing- waiting to see where they put "September 11th Boulevard" or "USS Cole Parkway" in that town- particularly gives a great impression as all you're trying to do is fight a speeding ticket

Anyhow- got to court- first visit in about 9 years or so- last one was at the relatively genteel Newton courthouse- the hearing room for the traffic court magistrate was directly next to 2 criminal court ones- so you have the regular folks of traffic court- including one guy sporting his Best Buy uniform and one particular douchebag who paced back and forth talking both loudly and self-importantly on his cell phone- I felt like I must have looked like a professional male model for wearing the casual version (no jacket or tie and shirt out) of my work suit- Not to sound like a haughty asshole- but I realized could have never been a lawyer- which would have been in spite of my lack of aptitude for academic pursuits- but because of the thorough contempt for the most of those at the courthouse- aside from my self-contempt- with which I viewed my momentary visit that day

Get called in- the Commonwealth of Massachusetts and their various police agencies have figured out the way to beat drivers who used to be able to roll dice that the cop who wrote their ticket may not show for hearing- like when I beat a red-light/ blocking-the-intersection ducat in Boston proper 13 years ago- by having a state cop who sits stoically through your hearing- and creating system where you have to pay to appeal ticket with cop who wrote it and judge- for an off-the-top fee

I was there just to get a few miles knocked off the 88-in-a-65 I was given the Monday after Thanksgiving on the Massachusetts Turnpike- asked the magistrate how my ticket could be based on both an "estimate" and the light-imaging (LADAR) system cited on my ticket- got answer I didn't fully buy- but wasn't going to the mat over

Then moved onto my plea- which was basically "I'm not going to lie and say I wasn't speeding- but I wasn't going 23 over"- magistrate asked me what I thought I was doing- I said "maybe high 70's"- he took the 10 miles off and I was happily gone- though I had a momentary flash I should have gone for broke and tried to knock down the whole thing- but came to my senses and savored my incremental victory against The Man

-Speaking of encountering scumbags or jabbronis- Had to drive past Boston's Museum of Science to work downtown a couple days- Nothing funnier to me than the sight of some white, suburban 13-year-old kid on a field trip lined up outside with other white, suburban kids at 8:45 AM in head-to-toe Avirex-level street wear- could not stop laughing to myself when I saw that

-Seems like Domino's has really raised the ante on Pizza Hut's awful-looking pasta dishes- by serving them in bowls made out of what looks like to being the latest use devised for day-old pizza dough ("Chocolate Dipping Sticks", anyone?)- unbelievably bad-lloking concotion

Should be back sooner with more- eventually

Back on the grid- for another swing

Don't think I was tempting fate a few weeks back when I thumbed my nose at the "confickr" virus (1 April)- but whatever maladies were slowing down the operations of my computer the past few months finally caught all the way up to it last week and took me off the information superhighway for a few days last week

Hence, at least one of the reasons why I've been so lax in updating this blog lately- I've had other pursuits/ time-consumers on the internet- when my computer's been working- the instant-message function with certain members of of the other social site has been a particular focus lately- I've also been leading kind of an all-or-nothing work schedule- where I'll work about 40-50 hours in 4 days' time- then not work for about 5 days at a time has led to stretches where I literally do nothing but work and sleep or sit around and sleep- not much grist for interesting writing

Anyhow- I'll try to get in a quick entry before I return to New Jersey for a visit the next few days - before things pick up and I'm back to working something of a normal schedule for the remainder of the spring- and I'll have more of my regular out-and-about encounters to write about (or not)

-To return to one of the oldest themes of this blog- The Dunkin Donuts across the street from my usual work spot in Waltham- apparently had some sort of management change during one of the recent fallow periods for me there- The woman who'd been the manager there finally got a store closer to her residence in New Hampshire- so there's new management there for the first time in a couple years or so

Learned this the hard way one morning last week- when the new go-getter assistant manager (I assume) came out from behind the counter and addressed me as "Boss" with a business card in hand- asking me what the business levels were at the hotel I (usually) work at were- I told him it was very early (about 6:50 AM or so) to be asking me that and I'd been away for awhile- He wanted me to go back and sell hotel-function customers on the coffee there for a discount- I didn't have the energy, patience, wherewithall, whatever- to tell this guy that overpriced coffee is one of the ways the place makes money on groups- and just nodded and took the card- which I tossed pretty quickly once outside the store and forgot about it- for 2 hours or so

Until I went back for another coffee- and recieved the same treatment- same guy coming out from behind the counter with the "Boss..." opening line- until I pointed at him and said "You already asked me today"- He stopped and stammered "Well, I thought..."- "You already asked me" was my second response- Like I should have gone back to where I work and undercut the salespeople there for 10% or whatever on my coffee

-Speaking earlier of the other social site (for the MySpace readers) or Facebook- as its known- for the 2 or so Blogger readers I have - I like to think the random public listings for some groups has become kind of like the modern-day version of the 1970's game show "The Joker's Wild"- particularly if you end up joining any school/ alumni-type group and may end up next to people you'd least likely want to be associated with after a number of years- the closest I've seen for myself was when I had it happen on my public listing where both "Magnum P.I." groups I was in turned up as my public listing there

Country Time and chopper pads

Not sure I should be writing about this- but not many read this stuff anyhow- in either of its venues- so, I figure I'm relatively safe in this admission: Tonight, I actually bought a hair re-growth product for the first time

I never thought it would come to this- years of making fun of the prematurely bald- particularly the kid in high school that drew the nickname "Country Time" for going bald at about 16 and looking like the old man from the old Country Time lemonade ads of the late 1970's- years of now-dumb-looking mullets for me and no real cares about losing my hair- until a couple years ago when someone at work was looking to make fun of me and claimed a mere lapse in getting my hair cut/ semi-consciously growing it out a bit was an attempt at a comb-over

Since then- I've been kind of self-conscious about my retreating front and burgeoning chopper pad on top- I didn't really care all that much when I started to show signs I was going gray years ago- my mother regaled me with tales of her discovering bits of gray as early as when she was 16- and I really didn't begin to show any of that until I was at least 30 or so- until parts of my beard went all-gray/ white awhile after

I had not really noticed any diminishing returns up top until about 3 years ago or so- particularly when my hair was wet or it was windy out or something- But, in recent months- I've actually become somewhat obsessed with whatever's been going on up on top at pretty much all times- to the point I'd thought about obtaining some type of product to counter that

Tonight- was at the still-remodeling Target store in Watertown- looks done from outside- but not nearly done inside- went to makeshift 'Hair Care' aisle- like I usually do on most visits- of course time I look for Rogaine or whatever- there's 2 workers and 2 other customers in aisle- pretty much like first time I ever bought underage booze, condoms or pornography- want as few people to see me when I actually scope out and buy that shit for first time- I'm sure the next adult frontier for me will be if I ever need adult incontinence products when I'm really old- or something similarly embarrassing- there will be at least 5 people around that aisle/ area when I go looking for it

Anyhow- looked at the name-branded Rogaine stuff- none of it under $50- see the Target store brand 1990-era knockoff of it for under $20- decide I'd rather piss away under $20 if I abandon the course of treatment rather than the $50- of course the store brand will probably turn my scalp red, burn off the rest of my hair or get in my eyes and make my blind or something like that- But I guess I'll have to take those odds for now- We shall see

-Wrote of the usual Red Sox media lovefest last week- was watching the rain-delayed-to-Tuesday Opening Day for the Olde Towne Team- Thought it was incredibly dumb they had the players come out of the stands to make their entrances on Opening Day- Always thought that was kind a cheesy populism ever since the "Larry Sanders" episode where the network talked him into running through the crowd at the end of his how (like Jimmy Fallon does now)

Saw most players high-fiving crowd on way down- with exception of Dustin Pedroia- but was waiting for likes of either injury-prone J.D. Drew or David Ortiz to slip on beer-soaked steps and injure selves- Did not come to pass- but still thought was dumb

-Cannot believe Tuesday was one-year anniversary of Kathie Lee Gifford on the ancillary 4th hour of the "Today" show- saw they even brought Frank back out for the occasion- I'll never compliment a woman's breasts to her again without thinking he shouldn't get a royalty for his talk to one-time stewardess Suzanne Johnson many years ago

-All the preceding makes the pairing of classic college basketball coaches in their underwear for the "Guitar Hero" ads with what's left of Metallica's credibility almost fathomable- can't see Bob Knight or Coach K getting down to even the post-"..and Justice for All" catalog

Les contretemps du blog

I don't know if my French is correct- but I figured I'd get in a few thoughts before the internet as we know it is taken down tomorrow (1 April)- at least for us Windows users

I've been writing this blog- in one form or another- for a little less than the past three years- There have been some conventions and a relative set of mores I've tried to adhere to for that time- One of which has been to never attribute anything I write directly to people I know or their identities here on the internet- lest I be accused of unfairly characterizing someone or an event they were involved in- or writing anything that could be taken as cheap shots or unfair slagging

Anyhow- there have been a number of occasions where I've written about stuff that I then opted to characterize to anonymous friends and associates of mine- or I've flat-out passed on writing about certain events here to avoid any amount of possible misrepresentation of either myself or those involved- Its common sense to a certain degree- I'm not going to turn my mundane existence into a homeless man's version of TV favorites like "Gossip Girl", "Sex in the City" or some other crap like that

With that said- I unwittingly found myself embroiled in a situation like that a week or so back- A female acquaintance of mine had a sort-of worst-case scenario-level story that happened to her- one I will not recount here- and shared it with a few people over various means of communication- including the instant messaging feature of a popular social network

One of those she did that with took it upon themselves to take screen captures of their conversation- featuring this girl's name and photo- and post them to their blog- with minor edits
-which then led some of the people who commented to address their feelings on it to the person in the story

The whole point of the screen capture and ID of this person was more for the writer to show off a witty quip they delivered in the IM exchange that was a play on something else on this person's social profile- than to express any kind of either empathy or disdain for the person telling the story- which in a weird way, to me, is even worse than doing it out of disdain or disapproval- It was sort of using her as the platform or butt, so to speak, for the one-man Algonquin Round Table to show off the funny they made- sort of at their expense

Anyhow- the subject of this told me about it and sent me a link to the aforementioned blog- which I read, then anonymously posted a comment telling the writer I thought it was rather uncool of them to post someone's private IM's without their consent and to use their name and image as an accompaniment- I did it more out of a feeling that this was somewhat unfair to my friend and did such the same I would do any friend

A day or so later- the blog writer responded- in their comment section- by telling me- in short order- that they knew my last name started with a 'G'- inferring they'd looked up my IP address, that I was only doing that to impress this girl in some form and he wasn't trying to be cool anyway- so "uncool" didn't register as an insult

I thought about respondeing- but decided not to bother- I figured out the person didn't have the goods on my internet presence and decided I didn't want to get into what would be no better than an internet pissing contest with someone who seemed to be courting the attention- when all I merely meant to do was state my case that their actions weren't really kosher- not trying to declare myself Arbiter of the Internet or try to engage someone who's deluded themselves into fancying themselves as some type possessor of a rapier wit

-I still cannot get over the media free ride the local sports teams here in New England get- particulalry the Red Sox- who last week announced they were freezing their 2009 concession prices at 2008 levels and were treated by the local media as though it was going to be free food and nickel beer down at the old ballyard this summer- My response to this can be summed up by the classic quote from the former New Jersey Nets star Derrick Coleman -"Whoop-de-damn-doo"

-Speaking of the news media- I've been wound into this confickr frenzy and feel like I'm chancing fate by merely being on the internet here at 12:15AM ET on 1 April- If the interwebs manage to survive- then I'll see you on the other side